20w update

How far along: 20w4d

Total weight gain: Still down 13 lbs from pg starting weight.  That said, I’m up 4 lbs. from where I was a month ago, so I guess we are going in the right direction.  Having my appetite back just in time for the holidays (and namely, my sister-in-law’s macaroons) didn’t hurt.

General disposition:  Eh, this is a toughy.  I mean, really, like I can separate the stress and business of our current circumstances from the pregnancy?  Not possible.  I’m glad to be back under the care of my beloved Dr. G and the team of MFMs at Toledo Hospital.  I’m as comfortable as I can be in these limbo weeks between “past 20” and “viable at 24.”  It isn’t the most fun month, and yes, I feel a little bit like I’m just surviving or holding my breath until 24w, but even then… Anyways.  I’m good.  Enough.

Sleep:  Again, hard to answer in light of the pregnancy alone.  I am busy all day, so I’m tired at night.  But Seth has been sick and Erin cut two teeth this past week, so my sleep has been interrupted by my older two, not the little one. 

Best moment this week: Realizing I can trigger movement with sugar!

Movement:  See previous. =)  I have not had very consistent movement much before this last week/10 days, and it’s been disconcerting, because Seth, Duncan, and Erin were all early, frequent movers.  This baby also tends to stay low and left 90% of the time; I’m feeling a little beaten up in that region. 

Labor Signs/Body Changes of Note:  I’m having a lot of discomfort with my belly button. I don’t think I mentioned that about 15w, I was told my umbilical ring is “compromised” which basically means I have a hernia at my belly button that can’t be repaired until during my c-section.  Ugh.  It’s painful.  Also, in the last week, I’ve started leaking colostrum.  Crazy!  “Normal,” but still….earlier that I’d like to worry about having nursing pads on hand.

What I miss:  Sleeping on my stomach, and bending over easily. 

What I am looking forward to:  My ultrasound on Feb. 10.  It will have been almost 2 months between scans for me, which is longer than I usually go, so I’m excited to see how much the baby has grown.

And speaking of “grown,” here is me at 20w and change….

 
For comparisons’ sake, here I am at 21w with Erin:

 
And though unposed, at 19w with Duncan:

 
And at 22w with Seth:

 
Crazy!  To look back.  To see the physical changes, but also, for me, to see, in the “hidden messages” in each photo, the changes that my journey to motherhood has done in me as a woman.